


Helped Me? No you Killed Me!

by recklesslybad



Series: shattered but repairing [1]
Category: The Witcher (TV)
Genre: Angst and Feels, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Angst and Humor, Angst with a Happy Ending, Bad Decisions, Comfort/Angst, Eventual Smut, F/M, Gratuitous Smut, I'm Bad At Summaries, I'm Bad At Tagging, M/M, My First Smut, Shameless Smut, im a sucker for fluff tbh
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-06
Updated: 2020-11-07
Packaged: 2021-02-28 19:55:40
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 7
Words: 8,244
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23032831
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/recklesslybad/pseuds/recklesslybad
Summary: He left with her. He looked me in the eyes and left. That's how he was. I saw the signs I looked the other way. I was the coward that didn’t want to see them. The tears came and they stayed.quick summarygeralt cheats with yen, jaskier gets in deep shit and doesn't know how to handle it
Relationships: BAMF Jaskier - Relationship, Cirilla Fiona Elen Riannon & Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia, Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia & Jaskier | Dandelion, Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion, Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Yennefer z Vengerbergu | Yennefer of Vengerberg, Yennefer cares you guys, badass Yennefer - Relationship, even more badass jaskier, geralt being confused, geralt is a idiot, hurt jaskier - Relationship, powerful jaskier - Relationship, sad geralt - Relationship, sad jaskier - Relationship, secret creature jaskier, threatened - Relationship, vampire jaskier - Relationship
Series: shattered but repairing [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1655347
Comments: 17
Kudos: 58





	1. end in the beginning

**Author's Note:**

> dialogue is not my strong suit literally, but if you like this story please tell me and also give my a lot of honesty if i need to do something different and also should i continue the story?  
> and should i make this a lot longer?

Being a bard wasn’t easy, being the witchers favored bard wasn’t any easier, the constant change of pace.

The monsters and the million near experienced deaths were not something he would ever miss if geralt decided to ever retire.

Jaskier retired to his room after his umpteenth performance of toss a coin to your witcher and he released a sigh and opened his and geralt's room for the night.

Monster hunting lasted longer these months, sometimes stretching into the early morning.

coming back tired without a hello or an infamous “Hmm” but this was great. He was non-talkative and grumpy everyday but this felt colder, and jaskier didn’t understand why.

Pulling off his shirt and filling the tub up with water then it heats it up before stripping off his clothes and clamping in rather ungracefully.

He doesn't know how long he sits in the tub but its long enough that geralt comes stalking in rather rudely if he might add.

Jaskier gets out the same way he gets out with the gracefulness of a newborn cow starting to walk he grabs a towel and wraps it around his waist before trotting up to geralt and laying in a kiss only to be denied with was unlike his witcher.

“Geralt” 

the bard says questioning the witcher as he follows him to his side of the bed. “Are you alright you're home rather early and not covered in blood” the bard question looking geralt over.

“jaskier...Hmm”

jaskier looked at geralt in such fondness and love it could rival the gods and goddesses in the sky and wither flowers with how powerful his love for geralt a love geralt didn't believe he could ever obtain.

A knock at the door sounded interrupting geralt. He smelled her sweet lilac and gooseberry scent that sent shivers down his spine and a red tinted blush on his cheeks.

he fidgeted with the bed covers and looked down ashamed and embarrassed jaskier something unfitting of geralt. 

Going to the door and opening it jaskier saw Yennefer she’s found us when we were in town and asked for our help well geralt's help more than mine. 

“Good evening yen what did i bestow to get such a gift to my room” 

jaskier said opening the door for her to come in as she did the air became tense and colder.

“Hi jaskier... i'm just stopping by to check up on things”

she said in a teasing and slow smirk as her gaze landed on geralt's tense shoulders and looked back at the bard.

“nothing is wrong yennefer were fine thank you for the-” 

yen cuts him off with a flourish of her hand and lets her eyes land on geralt. “I see you didn’t tell the bard geralt must i truly do everything dear geralt”.

yen teased in a slow manner. “tell me what geralt-” geralt stands and surveys the scene laid out in front of his eyes his confused and lover and his…” friend”.

He stalls and looks at me before talking the nervousness something jaskier has never seen before well not on geralt.

“Me and Yen...hmm...jaskier i believe...Fuck.”

geralts groans out before he picks up his travel bag and swords before turning to jaskier fully. 

“I believe we should go different paths...the nights we spent together were fun and new but you are not the right one for me i’ll leave you with the coin you have made but this will be the last you see of me.’’

geralt says looking jaskier in the eyes and walking to yennefer and grabbing her hand.

Needless to say jaskier heart breaks into pieces each word geralt says each action he makes before moving over to yennefer and grabbing her hand.

the hand jaskier remembers when they walked down the road together when they first started becoming more than friends.

Becoming lovers or the night they first made love on a bed instead of the campgrounds so needless to say jaskier shattered completely and utterly shatters.

Jaskier just looks at geralt waiting for him to let go of yennefer's hand and hug jaskier laughing saying it was a harmless prank.

But this was too horrible for geralt to laugh about so geralt was serious the look in his eye and the way his brows drew together in his was of watching.

“You're both kidding...right sweet melitele-” 

jaskier retorts eyeing them both with growing disdain the longer the silence stretches his heart burns with a fury and sadness he hasn't felt since he left his family.

“I'm sorry jaskier i didn’t know how to tell you-” 

jaskier snapped his head towards yennefer and glowered. “Get out I want nothing more to do with both of you” 

Jaskier says clenching his fist and holding back the tears that threatened to spill from his baby blue eyes.

He didn't look up at the sound of the door closing or the pounding footsteps, he simply clenched the small pendant his father gave him.

He let out a small gasp and fell to the bed too hard for a comfortable bed not knowing where to go now. 

the He let out a bitter laugh and huffed out a curse this night is simply shit but jaskier wasn't the type to simply sit around and be sad no he needed release and he had a tavern under his room 

The Ale didn't taste like horse piss and was cheap, he put on his best silk and smiled falsely and he made his way downstairs each step closer the noise got louder.

‘’bards back aye play ya music some more eh?’’ 

the barmaid hollered out from across the bar lifting some Ale in acknowledgement. 

Jaskier simply shook his head and sat in one of the bar seats in the back soon after the barmaid brought fresh ale to jaskier.

1 Pint of ale became a lot more pints before jaskier couldn’t even stand straight let alone see the face of the woman who sat down next to him.

when she sat down next to him he didn't know, the words she was speaking to him went out one ear and threw the other.

he didn’t react when she grabbed him up and took him somewhere that wasn’t his room.

Did he once complain as this mystery one dragged him off past the tavern no he didn’t, did he complain as he saw the houses thin out and he saw more woods than people. 

No he didn’t but he probably should have.

jaskier looks up at the women with brunette long sweeping hair with her brown eyes and full lips, you can say jaskier was a little distracted to notice they stopped.

Jaskier was barely standing up straight. He used the tree to stand up and looked at the girl expectably.

“I presume you didn’t lead me out her to stand and look darling” 

jaskier said stumbling to the women that was standing still in the middle of the clearing.

As he was walking he stumbled to the ground but caught himself.

jaskier was standing up and he saw a pair of boots that was rusted and covered in blood. He wouldn't deny a small pang of hope fluttered in jaskier that geralt had returned to him.

jaskier almost doesn’t want to look up afraid he’ll see geralt’s pitied expression or his irritation, a small drip wakes him out mind a drip he looks down.

Blood. till warm. fresh 

His hand has a small drop of blood he knows he isn’t hurt so he looks up at the women startled only to find a different woman.

She was naked with boots on blood dripping down her mouth.

down to her chest, her stomach and drips down to the ground.

he scrambles back but not too far back before his back hits a solid surface he turns around and sees a man he gets up and looks around him only to see he’s surrounded

Something is very wrong. He may not be a Witcher or a Sorceress but he senses danger like any man with an ounce of sense.

Yes some days he runs into it but geralt isn’t here to save him not this time or ever again.

“uh I must get going you can’t eat a man with …bread in his…Pants”. 

He stumbled away mentally punching himself. He tries to walk away before he’s blocked again.

“he smells of the witcher…everywhere” one says looking at him with a critical eye up and down.

“I..take a lot of offense to that” 

“Kill him”

Well Fuck.


	2. Fuck.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I’m sorry. No chapter yet.

I was planing on sending a new chapter out today I spent days perfecting it. But then tragedy struck ironically my computer broke, because I wanted a drink and I clumsily spilt it all my progress gone.   
The smut perfect  
The feels hard and crushing  
Geralt being a emotionally constipated   
Jaskier in pain   
Yennefer along for the ride 

But never fear I have a solution in one week I’ll have a chapter out (hopefully)


	3. Better than certain death

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jaskier gets captured and talks his way from a quick death to a slow and painful death sweet melitele save him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was rushing to get this chapter published it’s not as good as the first draft I had but it’s something I want to slowly go into Jaskiers background in the next chapter and really get into his feelings about his past so their won’t be as much dialogue in the next chapter but after that chapter I want to explain geralt and Jaksier relationship in more details how they met is self-explanatory but how those feelings grow so I’m gonna publish this chapter but slowly during this week I’m gonna edit it properly

Okay Gagged and tied up it was a start to something away from death so it was a win but by the gods How did Geralt do this everyday? Getting little coins sometimes no coin and always risking his life battling monsters after monster. Sweet melitele it was tiring.

Jaskier wasn't a completely useless bard after years of watching and maybe sometimes interfering, not always in the best way but he still interfered. 

Battling 5 bruxha’s and being a human?!. No no no bad idea in many ways. Getting dragged to a cave with bounds tied around your wrist unable to escape. And surrounded with a pack of angry supernatural monsters. Even worse.

How did jaskier get himself bound and dragged into a cave after the plan was for his painful and slow death. Well it was actually Quite the long shot

One Hour Earlier

“K-kill… No I don’t think- I think that’s a little harsh right ladies and gentleman” Jaskier exclaims a tad bit frightened alright. 

It was weird without Geralt getting him out of this mess and knowing he’d be left fending for himself but this, this was just horrible timing to say the least of the already shitty day.

“Have anyone ever told you, you talk to much'' one of the offenders says and jaskier huffs. “We can just kill him right now the stench is getting worse the longer he still lives”. The bruxha’s began descending on the bard like prey teasing they’re captured.

“What if I can capture the Witcher and his witch” Jaskier blurted out before thinking. Capture his ex-lover and his mistress. Him a human trying to capture 2 other supernatural creatures. Melitele blesses him.

“Capture the witch and a Witcher?! You a human you make me laugh.” A female bruxha belts out a rough laugh. Jaksier figures if he’s gonna regret this later he might as well add to the flames.

“I can do it, I have connections with both of them”. He says forging confidence the gears in his head turning fast, his heart beating even faster. He had to play this out.

His heart thumping with pain just thinking about betraying geralts loyalty- the same loyalty geralt can easily destroy. 

“So you trade them in to save your own arse a cheat has no rights in this world and should be burned” A male bruxha says hissing at jaskier.

“I have loyalty the Witcher betrayed my trust and love and stepped on it so do not question my motives”. Jaskier tells the bruxha clenching his lute if he was gonna sell this it had to be the partial truth.

“Why are we still talking to our food? He will have no use for us brother”. Another bruxha says, and jaskier was getting rather confused at who was speaking when they all look the same in aspects.

“Yes but master will be pleased if we bring him back with information about the Witcher he’s of no use to master dead” the bruxha explains eyeing jaskier with disdain.

“We bring him to master capture him”

Present time

“So bard my children say you offer services to my search for the Witcher and the witch”. The king? Alpha? Says jaskier.

“I believe I can get the Witcher and the witch back correct…y-your highness?” Jaksier says still kneeling, his knees are beginning to ache from being in this position for so long.

A snort and a few snickers are heard. Did he say something wrong?.

A hand is raised and the snickers are silenced.

“How do you believe you can over-take a Witcher and witch both of which had training in the brutalist combat training known to man?”

Shit. Jaskier didn’t think of that. How was he going to take down a probably the most powerful being to grace this earth. Being an heir to the throne in his country it was crucial To learn how to fight.

But that was the past and he didn’t have enough practice or patience nor the time to catch up to the two beings. 

“I do not know sir but all I need is a little bit of time-“

“Time?! How much time will you need as a human?” The taller man yelled and it was still somehow graceful jaskier flinched-a-little.

This was taking a turn for the worst and if jaskier didn’t turn this around soon he’d be 6 ft below ground with the little meat he has on his body in the stomach of these creatures.

“I know a little about p-potions I can-“ 

“No use the witch will smell poison a mile away, maybe even the Witcher. It seems you have no plan deemed worth my time as a human; you'll spend the last few days of your pathetic human life in the cells.

He dismissed me and the remaining bruxha dragged away to the cells which surprised the bard he suspected bruxha leaving in rotten hunts not in an abandoned castle which was rotting at the touch. 

“Useless humans the bunch of you lot” the same female bruxha from earlier that wanted to eat him considering they all wanted to eat him. She wanted to eat him the most.

She opens the cell and drags jaskier by the hair to the wall and rough chains him by the arms leaving him in an uncomfortable standing position with the metal digging into his wrist.

“Why do you all hate humans?” Jaksier mumbles and tugs at the chains before looking at the female.

She stays quiet and glares at him with a withering glare that challenges Yennefer’s glare before answering him.

“Why would I possibly tell my life story to a liar human, humans are just monsters in pretty disguises that would kill the truth then face it” she says slowly.

“Not all humans are bad” Jaskier exclaims before another punch landed to his face rather harshly it caused his head to bang on the concrete and his nose and mouth to bleed.

“Humans are fragile too one punch was enough to render you dizzy and make you bleed.” She says mockingly before punching me in the stomach just as hard making the Ale I was once drinking spew On the floor.

“Human all you are doing is making my thoughts more true based on humans” she says before walking to the door and slamming it shut before locking me inside.

“Humans are horrible creatures that deserve death in the worst ways they call us monsters because we’re more powerful than they will ever be and that scares them” she tells him before walking away.

She had points that humans were horrible beings. Jaskier can think several times humans were monsters and thought their actions were the right ones, but the same went for the monsters. 

Life was just a pile of false judgement and pain. 

Sleep did not come easy that night.


	4. Valen~

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Geralt and Yennefer look for Ciri, jaskier is in a terrible situation once again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So ima clear some things up. Ciri is NOT an adult after geralt finds her in the show episode 8 this is like a continuation of that 3 months later the Nilfgaard soldiers found geralt , Ciri and Yennefer because they was together. Keep in mind jaskier and geralt weren’t on speaking terms because of the mountain argument. So Ciri has no clue who jaskier is Besides when he preformed at the party and jaskier only know stories of her. And when jaskier did find them it was a day after Ciri, geralt and Yennefer got split up, which lead up to geralt and jaskier becoming romantically involved more about that topic between jaskier, Yennefer and geralt later in the story. The rest are things I don’t wanna spoil for you guys but the rest are just things I didn’t want you guys to get confused about. And sorry for the long wait I broke my phone and when I would try and write I would have a lot of messy words so I gave up till I got my current new phone. Sorry this is long but it’s really informative.

Bloody Baron (Chapter Name)

“A man named Hendrik believes he spotted Ciri in Velen accompanied along with a little girl,” Yennefer says, zipping up her dress and turning to me with a grace I couldn’t accomplish in my immortal life.

“Velen? That’s a day's ride excluding stopping for rest and food” I grunt out wiping my sword down with oils and a new seal.

“Yes but we have to get to Ciri before the nilfgaardian soldiers get on her trail.” Her “trail” is something me and Yennefer have known since we parted from jaskier. We have been trailing her since late winter before going cold. 

“And after we catch her trail how would we find her again if she ran off again? She must have told the baron where she was going or the child.” I said, as Yennefer pulled out a map from who knows where. 

“Anything she wore or touched I would be able to sense her but it has to be recently touched or worn”

“Were gonna need rest if we’re leaving early morning yenn” 

“Your right goodnight geralt” she said leaving the room.

Flashback

“It’s gonna get dangerous for jaskier, he's not as strong nor fast as us he’s a liability to finding Ciri.” Yennefer said as she and I began picking wood for the campfire.

“What do you suggest I do Yennefer I’m not leaving him in the middle of the fucking woods with a note.”

“Come on Geralt I’m saying we tell him we have to go our separate ways and we will find Ciri” 

“That can take years Yennefer we would have to train Ciri for months until she’s ready to separate from us Yennefer” 

“Jaskier would never leave even if we tied him down he’d somehow follow us no matter what u throw or yell at him.” I said fondly and thought back to our earlier adventures when a punch to the gut wasn’t enough to stop him.

“He got hurt today geralt he almost died if you didn’t get too him in time he would’ve been found for the animals to Nibble on so ether we tell him to be safe and stop following us or he’s gonna die he is neither a Witcher or a Sorcerer he’s human, not immortal.” 

“Yennefer no matter how many times I tell him to stop following he disobeys, what I do for a living is not suited for him but he believes my scars are stories with meaning.”

“Sometimes geralt you have to hurt the people you love the most” 

“Even if it kills you?”

Jaskier. My Bard. My songbird. My love oh I have left you hurting and broken may one day you forgive me 

Jaskier 

“Wakie wakie bard time to get up.” Some said slapping my cheek waking me up from my uncomfortable nap on the floor.

“Yah yes perfect your up, here food you may be a prisoner but we shall feed you.” A male voice said it was dark in the cell so I couldn’t see the face of the man.

“I expected you all to kill me and use my blood to bath in and become younger.” I said in a teasing matter but the joke went over his head. 

“We haven’t done that in 100 years…”he replies slipping the food too me and getting up for a bruxha he’s charming even if that is not his true appearance. 

“Are they going to kill me?” Asking made me feel worse but I’d rather die than risk the chance of ever seeing Geralt and Yennefer, scowling I pick up the stale bread and nibble on it.

“Have he hurt you that much that you would risk your life killing them?” 

“You were at the clearing yesterday night?” 

“Correct all my family know you are here but only a few know the situation.”

“Ah I see…your king-“

“Our father”

“Your father could've killed me but he didn’t why?”

“We were gonna slit your throat and drain you of your blood in the middle of the night”

“Uh oh”

“But father came across a idea we do not know of the idea but we shall announce it once were seated”

Dining room

“My children we have a new guest that will help us defeat the wretched Witcher and the witch that helps him, the bard that sang praise to Geralt of Rivia.” The father of the bruxa announces at the head of the table. 

“Jaskier the bard was betrayed by the Witcher and had an improper relationship with the witch.” The “King” announced louder several eyes eyed me up and down with amusement and some with mistrust. 

“So I propose a business agree with the bard to allow him to become a ally and maybe even family what do you say bard under certain conditions”

Choice A. I decline the offer and run out of this run down castle and die or B I agree with any terms and hunt down my ex lover who is a Witcher and his mistress who is a sorcerer. Choice A was looking quite good right now.

“I would accept with your proposal but I would like to know more about what you are offering me sir” 

“Yes of course bard I’m offering something no mere mortal would ever get in there lifetime a chance to be on top of the food chain bard I’m proposing a chance to be a bruxa, and in return you bring us the Witcher’s head”

My heart was hammering against my chest and the snickers and snorts I guess they heard.

“I accept your proposal”. I blurted out like a complete idiot oh geralt was gonna kill me if he ever found out.

“Tell me what I should do and I’ll do it” 

5 months later 

These past months I was trained to handle a Stainless Miao Dao so elegant and sharp light weight and it didn’t draw as much negative attention, I was trained to use a raven claw combat knife that was easily hidden in my boots. Training was Relentless but my training from when I was a noble paid off and helped me move more gracefully.

“Jaskier you have grown from a weak bard to a true warrior and I believe it’s time you truly because one of us” 

“An insult and praise I must have truly grown”

“Still have the attitude of a bard” 

“Always a bard but heart sheik”

“We will be performing the ceremony tonight at first night”

“Ceremony I thought you just Bit me on the neck and called it a day?”

“Those are folk tales stories the nobles and the townspeople yap about to comfort themselves so jaskier rest now and I’ll send Jess to get you when the time is up please rest”

“Yes sheik”

Geralt

“My wife is with the croons and you left her there?!” The baron exhales angrily, his yellow and crooked teeth showing.

“You told me to find her and not bring her back. I held up my end of the deal I want to know what happened with Ciri” 

“I never break a promise fine...After she came with the young girl they both went to work in the kitchen both needed something to do, they were restless, but Ciri she told me one day she cannot stay, having a fresh and energetic face around were doing wonders for the kids and the women around I told her to stay but she insisted she was stubborn and very persistent I agreed only but only if I have some of my men escort her to where she was going”

“Where was she heading?” 

“Novigrad” 

“It barricaded in with Romanian guards at every entrance and exit. How did you get her in?”

“The papers I gave her is a protection order that no harm shall come to her as she is under my protection” 

“And how did you come across these papers”

“When you have connections you become somebody”

“Did she successfully make it to novigrad”

“Yes she did my men will most likely have more information” 

“Who are the men I need to talk to”

“Ybr he guards my door I’ll get him”

As the baron moves to get ybr I look around his chambers and the colors clash horribly and the light in the fire grows dim.

“You wanted information about the young girl Ciri” a man I believe to be ybr ask.

“I just want to know if she said where exactly she was going and who she was going to see” 

“She did not say who she was meeting just that she hoped to find someone there”

“I see I must get going”

“Witcher help me get my wife back please” 

“It would be suicide to go”

“Would you let your daughter stay there”

“No but I’m a Witcher”

“I ask of your assistance just to get her back”

“I’m sorry but I have to leave I suggest leaving her there she’s caring for the children and has food and shelter” 

I leave the village with a full pouches of coin and protection paper and a sign of entrance from the baron and head off to Novigrad as soon as I restock my supply and get roach feed and rested. It would be a matter of days to get they’re, and I have no time to spare.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay and also jaskier is in for a painful discovery Next chapter and I’m sorry


	5. I don’t understand

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So was the chapter a little rushed? Yes I’ve been really busy with getting a job cause I need one to save up for college and every other life aspects. I hope you guys like this chapter I welcome negative and positive feedback and my friend says jaskier should start a bad streak and catch some people he may not wanna see attaining but idk do y’all wanna see that in next chapters I’m open for recommendations also you guys, don’t be shy write some more

“This looks more like a blood sacrifice than a turning sheik”

“Because it is the process of turning a human to bruxa is no easy process you have to be soul bound with the bruxa, if the bruxa doesn’t accept you then it will eat at your soul until you die and slow and painful death”

“Are you serious or are you just pulling my hair”

“We shall start but cutting both the palms of your hands and placing them on the symbols”

I’m really starting to wish I would’ve chosen Choice A right now, I grab the knife out of the sheik hand and walk up to the podium.

“So just “slice slice” that’s it”

“No that will not be it bard”

“Well can you give me a run by of the process”

“Just cut your palms damnit jaskier”

“Okay okay”

The knife was heavy in my hand the black marble of the blade was reflecting off the fire making in look more ominous I clenched my eyes shut and placed the knife to the palm of my hand and cut it I repeated it to my left hand as I place my hands on the markings I see sheik move to a bookshelf and grab a book.

“Firmly place both hands on the markings and press down your blood is a offering and a sign of loyalty to the bruxa that walked before us”

“So basically-”

“Silence”

“Oh okay…. so are these like the passed-”

“Quiet!”

“You wouldn’t even know I’m here because i will be so quiet”

“Jaskier stop talking or I swear I will cut out your tongue”

“Shutting up now”

“By the light of the moon and our piercing pain we are further transformed into cunning beast from the circle of life to the elevation of man I shall reawaken and be a new man” 

The pain that flowed through my arms was unexpected; my veins were discolored and pulsing, the markings on the podium glowed red and shook violently.

“Calm down jaskier the worst of it is yet to come”

“This wasn’t the worst of it?!”

“Blood red, pale skin, beauty of gods and goddesses, power of all,moonlight draw me in quench my thirst coursing veins let my body feel no pain”

The pain took minutes to slow. It coursed through my veins and slowly disappeared, sweat dripping from my face, throat bruised and itchy. 

“Almost there, jaskier this is the last one”. A voice behind me startled me out of my thoughts, yanna was a girl with long dark hair and dark skin that complimented her eyes. If I wasn’t in pain I’d make ballets about her eyes. 

The time slowed down and everything blurred together.

“See the cruelty and the pain that you have caused once again I turned the tables three times three bring death to your actions shall you be free when light fades and dusk comes through the pain you caused wil fade.

Silence 

“Don’t leave me in suspense”

“His scent...is different” yanna says sniffing me and i don’t know if that was rude or not and I frankly don’t care around this time if I stink or not.

“Your right his scent is different jaskier look me in the eyes”

Looking him in the eyes was like selling my soul, allowing him to look into my deepest secrets, my regrets, the guilt, the pain

“Hm take him to his room I’ll stop by soon yanna”

“Yes father come on jaskier”

“Carry me”

“...As you wish”

Yennefer

“How is your search for your child?” Triss asks, combing out her dark curls.

“Geralt tracked down a man named bloody baron who had information on Ciri but wanted Geralt to find his wife and child.”

“Did he find them”

“Yes his daughter went to novigrad and joined the eternal fire his wife was with the croons taking care of the orphans geralt has to clue on what happened to the baron and his wife but rumor has it the baron and his wife are seeking a healer but we can never truly know”

“At least they have what they wanted...speaking of having something… where is jaskier you have not mentioned him when you mention geralt”.triss asks putting the brush down on the table.

“Truss...We had to leave him I believed he was a hazard to looking for Cirilla everything was too dangerous and geralt and I couldn’t save him everytime he bullshited his way in a situation”

“Are you completely mad? He's just gonna keep bullshitting his way into situations putting him in more risk, why would you leave him especially when people know he’s connected to geralt and you?” 

“As you said Triss he can bullshit his way in situations he can bullshit his way out of them...I would like it if we can talk about something else as this conversation is pointless.”

Geralt 

“I have no knowledge of an ashen-haired women apologizes master Witcher”

“No witcher haven’t seen her”

“Nay Witcher never seen such a beauty if you find her my girls would love a friend”

I nicely excuse myself from the nice lady and walk down a narrow alley I’ve been here for hours and still nothing besides contacts that are lingering on the message board. 

“Psst witcha I heard you were looking for an ashen haired kid.” A man— not bu a boy whispered dressed in rags but held a kind smile.

“Yes I am, have you seen her?”

“Does she have green eyes and a sword? 

“Yes she does”

Finally someone reliable in this horrid town

“outside the border when I was going to get da cloth for my mum when I seen her with a women she was pale and old they looked odd and I’ve never seen them before but believe she was a healer butI never seen or heard of a healer here”

“Did you see the way they went”

“Yep I followed them!”

“You followed them?! Show me kid”

Jaskier

“Would you like some honeycomb? I believe transformation for humans is energy taking.”yanna says, grabbing a piece from her pocket.

Since I was the only human in the castle the other bruxa’s grown a habit of having little foods on them when I was around since I am the only one that eats human food. 

“No thank you I feel I would puke it up if I did” 

“Agreed but jaskier what do you think that was about.” Yanna said, taking her hand out of her bottoms.

“I don’t know but I’d rather lay down on my little Mat and rest.” I say moving to burn out the flame in my corner room.

“Alright the transformation will take a few hours and you may be in a lot of pain as it takes over because venom that the human body isn’t used to in entering the stream of blood and taking over.” Yanna says, pulling the cover up to my chest.

“Fun...so what do you think sheik might find?”

“I don’t know but it wasn’t a pleasurable smell coming from him-“

“Did something happen to the sacrifice? Did I do something wrong?”

“The sacrifice was successful but I don’t know why it turned out the way it did”

“We will find out tomorrow then”

“Goodnight jaskier I will fill Fredrick in on what happened”. Yan said leaving the room and shutting the door most likely going to fill her lover Fredrick in on today's events.

Geralt 

“Up that mountain in a hiding In the tree’s is the healer's house Sir Witcher.” The boy said pointing to the hilltop.

“Thanks kid here’s some coin”

“This is enough coin to feed my family for a week! Thank you sir” the boy says running back to the town.

I watched him run out of my sight before turning around and trekking up the hill. It took minutes before I saw the healer outside her house sitting in a chair smiling in greeting

“I’ve been expecting you witcha I suspect you're looking for a ashen haired young woman.” She says walking out of her garden and going in the cabin motioning me inside with her bony fingers.

“Yes ma'am she was last seen with you a boy told me”

"Yes that is correct I only healed but a woman named phillipa lives in velen in a cave deep in the woods she can help you further she's a witch." She says handling me 3 diamonds. "Aard is the only way to activate them witcha"

“But I have more questions-”

“No time for sitting around bring me Phillipa and I shall tell you what happened may the light guide you”

She said, pushing me out the house with incredible strength for a elderly woman I grunt and walked to roach annoyed with the extra work I have to do alone, the road is dark, stormy and quiet, a feature I have sadly gotten used to again.

Jaskier (morning time)

“Wake up boy we have work to do”

“Yes sheik, why must you disrupt my beauty sleep?”

“We have a problem we must talk about”

“What happened is everyone okay?”

“Yes boy but not for long” 

“What?”

“Do you know what a kulam is”

“What?! No I don’t sounds like a food”

“Kulam is blood and dark magic extremely dangerous and rare mostly found in pure born females once every thousand blood moons a son is born from women who is chosen to mate with a human man that man and child are to be sacrificed because the son is to powerful to obtain”

“Why are you telling me this sheik this has nothing to do what me”

“I believe you are the son that’s never been sacrificed that is why you must leave to many dangerous have awoken in you I cannot put my family in harm's way I am sorry jaskier but by late afternoon you must leave”

“But sheik I’m a newly turned I don’t not understand new aspects”

“It is just has you learned since you were human before turned you can walk in the light for a full day before getting agitated, the taste for blood and flesh is easier to control and you can still eat regular food and the need to rest in reduced by a week, you jaskier is know the predator and everyone else is now your prey”

The door closes shut and I hear too quiet for human ears footsteps retreating footsteps up the stairs, once again I’m being abandoned. Again

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And I realize my phone is so weird I can’t bold any word when I paste the story because I writer this on docs so when I bold it the words just smush together making it weird anyway thanks for listening to my ted talk


	6. Novigrad

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> PSA: Bruxa’s are the Highest vampires they tend to pack together a group of 50 each having a “leader” to that group but they all have the “god” or “goddess” vampire but they do not report back to them about changing a human to bruxa because in a way they already know and they accept or deny them… 
> 
> Add this is unedited

“Jaskier this book it should help you.”sheik said handing me a black book with a purple pentagon etched in the book cover. 

“What am I supposed to do with this.” I ask opening the first page of the book and feeling the rough writing that had to be centuries old and worn out.

“Its book of dark and banned spells, jaskier You Must never give this book to anybody with the wrong intention boy.” Sheik says stuffing a few weeks worth of food into my pouch.

“I see but don’t understand why I would need it can’t I just wave my fingers and whatever I need appears?”

“That takes years to work and for that you have to memorize each spell and when you memorize the meaning you can create your own but always write it down with blood in this book I cannot explain why just do it.

“Alright but what if i run out of space to write my own spells and also Not all of these spells sound evil are there spells to help others”

“Jaskier you have dark and bruxa blood running in your veins if you believe anyone will believe what you have is a blessing you are misreading the dangers of this situation and if you shall by a plan book but draw a pentagon on the top and you have yourself a new dark spell book. Do not worry the old book shall imprint itself on the mind boy.” He says putting my weapons on my back before I can ask what he means .

I sigh and nod before looking back at the rusty castle before me. It was what I was used to now. I'll miss it. I turn around and walk a little ahead of Sheik and stop at the border sign Readying myself up for the long days ahead.

“Ride to Novigrad my brother in arms Hubert is a coroner he shall be able to help you with your bruxa side then You shall not tell him about the dark magic for he shall use you until you're indebted to him till your last breath.” Sheik said standing aside me.

“Understable but I must ask Novigrad is a day's walk sheik the darker the more the creatures come out why shall I not walk early morning.” I ask before I start my walk into the afternoon sky.

“You are the top of the food chain, jaskier the creatures want nothing to do with you and avoid your scent and your path at all cost now jaskier you must go your breaking daylight.”sheik says pushing me gently to the path.

I walk for hours till the sun is gone and the moon is high but I feel less tired and more energized if I continue this till mid-morning. I will be in Novigrad soon if it's night. I continue straight and keep to the shadows as geralt taught me and kept going. 

Geralt 

“Thank you, Witcher, most appreciated, here's your coin.”the old lady said, handing me a bag of coin and getting back to work on her potions.

“The information about the ashen-haired women” I said, stuffing the coin in my pouch. 

“As yes I found her in the woods not much to say I healed her and sent her on her way she said she must meet a man by the name of zolton I not ask for anymore information nots my business she left after she was healed but she said she needed to find a man named .”the woman says opening the door without with a wave of her hand. 

Without much left to do I start my trek down to the village with a bar and a stage and a brothel across from it. Hood lowered over my head, my eyes downcasted. 

Next day early morning

Walking into the Inn was a challenge with people shoving and yelling my senses and my mood was lowering each second. 

“Vodka and dinner and a room furthered from anyone”. I say to the barman and retreat to the dark corner seat far in the back.

The smell of vomit and sweat filled my senses as a woman with blonde hair and dull clothes kneels over by my corner and stumbles outside falling down the stairs. I pull my hood over my head and watch 

“Your vodka and dinner sir”. The man says holding out his hand and putting my food down.

I put the coin in his hand. He flinches at the dried blood and clutches my coin with reluctance and leaves.

The food was horrid and the vodka tasted washed down, a woman with blonde hair and colorful clothes walked on stage with a lute and an even brighter hat. Jaskier would love this and no doubt steal the girl's light and make everyone fall in love with his sound.

“A new song of heartbreak and mistakes-”

I start my trek upstairs tired and heavy walking up the stairs and pushing past everyone until I make it to my room with two beds in each respective corner and a tub in the corner near the door , a bath can come tomorrow.

I pull off my armor, weapons and clothes and throw them in a corner before crawling in bed and turning off the lights.

Jaskier

“No entry without a letter of acceptance from the eternal fire king back away before you rot with the rest”. A man says pointing me away from the entrance.

“Do you not know who I am sir I am jaskier the bard of the white wolf geralt of Rivia so how dare-”

“Last we heard geralt of Rivia left his bard to die and ran off with a witch and it’s clear you're not dead so it must be he got tired of you as his boy toy and left” Another guard says laughing causing the other to laugh. 

“Heard they tied-in last week in an inn in Skellige”another says.

“They did not get married, that's impossible”. I Say clenching my first. finding Geralt's child surprise was top priority for both they would never. 

“How would you know boy now off you go we have enough annoying Bards here don’t need another”

I walk down the bridge and wander aimlessly till I hit a river bank and sit down under a hidden tree far off. I count my food and my money and take out the book curious of what could maybe help me get in. 

I flip a few pages in and read aimlessly till I get to a page called transportation. Perfect. So how do I do this? Do I wave my hand?. 

I rummage through my bag and pull out my journal and copy the spell in there to put the book in before transporting just in case it doesn’t go well and I need to make a quick excuse.

I stand and face a building with a back entrance. Perfect place to go and not get discovered. I look down and recite the spell.

“Langue magicae I seek this child, cold and bound, what is nostra versa loca who is lost now is found.’’ I say before a flash of black and purple lands me on cold stone. 

“Ow you couldn't land me anywhere softer, maybe a nice pillow or in the middle of two women or men” I say to myself. It’s cold and dully with light fog. “And maybe somewhere less spooky”

I walk up the stairs and search through the bags to find something useful, a crystal and some purple dust in a vial and stuff it in my bag and look through the other bag and stuff more stuff in before walking to a cracked vault.

Who leaves a vault open

I open the vault and see handfuls of coins, part of me says leave it but the other part of me says take as much as you can and run as fast as you can, I obviously listen to the latter and grab as much as i can before closing the vault and heading to the open gate didn’t get a foot out the cell door before i started coughing and two drowners drowner jump at me. 

Fuck. 

drowners aren't something i expected in sewers, lakes and ponds sure but the fucking sewers that’s a surprise.

Pulling the Miao Dao out I advance on the drowners that snarl and bite at me the first one jumps and swipes at me with his left hand, I dodge to the right and cut off his arm before cutting off his head. The drowner's blood pouring out its place it's severed head used to be the blood of the drowner messing up my doublet. 

The second drowner makes a move when i am momentarily distracted and claws at my face and ripping a piece of my fabric off i moan in agony and jump back and put my sword in my placeholder on my back before grabbing my raven claw combat knife i wait until it swings again i grab the inside of his arm and jam my knife into the bottom of his skull and pulling it out as it moans and dies. 

The creature dies and drops from my hold limp and heavy i kick away the body as it falls to my feet and go to the stairs and sit down to collect myself feeling shaken and disorientated i look at the drowner bodies and almost gag at the stench, i shake my head to get rid of the tears in my eyes making my headache worse by the second i need to leave and patch myself up before i completely lose it.

I pull out the spell book looking for a invisibility spell or maybe a mind clouding spell anything to get me out of here i search the book till i come across 2 of the most helpful spells one a invisibility spell called “nor shall see” and and healing spell “shamanic healing” the name are a little bland for my taste but a spell is a spell.

I start the healing spell feeling as my face is bleeding and my arm cut open and bleeding almost frightening 

Earth below, sky above fills the dark of night with pain and shall the morning light take thy pain away and I shall be renewed again by sun to count my blessing one by one. 

A flash of black and purple flash dim but the spell must have worked because i felt better again the scar on arm look as a old scar but extremely noticeable if i had a mirror i would be able to glance at my probably scarred beautiful face, hair messy and knotted i felt in deep need of a shower and maybe a companion of the night.

I flip to the invisibility spell and repeat the words confidently feeling more used to the tingly feeling of the magic in my veins afterwords 

Dragon fog and chameleon sight, I command the shrouded sea . i blend the mist, i mix the light refract around from me, to be no longer blended i say the words “allow me to appear”

“Sweet melitele please let this work.’’ i mutter packing my book in my bag and tying it shut before walking out the gate to a riverbank and jumping out of it and landing with a grunt i look both ways before spotting a ladder and climbing up barely poking my head up and checking if the coast was clear, a perfect dog, a few women and a beggar no guards, no eternal fire guards i swiftly climb up the leader i look both ways before continuing towards a beggar.

“Hello ma’am can you point me to the coroner.” I ask as she continues to beg the noble and peasants that walk past but continue to ignore me. “Oh yeah i'm invisible well this is a solo quest it seems” 

Heading to an inn before finding the coroner would be a better idea than going to Hubert invisible, I walk down the main street and find an inn across from the brothel, Perfect.

I walk to the back of the Inn and see a woman passed out in a heep of vomit. I step around her and make sure she passed out before saying.

“Allow me to appear”

I step over the woman again and walk inside the inn and up to the barman and offer a tense and polite smile.

“One room sir and please bring some food and a bath.” I ask the man to hand over more coins than needed.

“Only one left you will have to share with another bard all the way upstairs the furthest room from anyone left side ”. He says before turning around and cleaning a cup. “Good luck bard”. He mumbles and moves to the next nobleman. I walk up the stairs to the top floor and go to the furthest room to the left. I smell the man before I see him and he smells putrid. I open the door and walk into the room and do a double take.

“So this is what the barman meant when he said goodluck...no fucking wonder’’ i say dropping my bag and closing the door. ‘’I don't know who's gonna need it more me or you!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (in the beginning of the story I neglected to tell where they are so when geralt broke jaskier heart they were in a inn in the village of Loggers hunt the castle where the bruxa castle is located is in a abandoned village called Drahim castle jaskier is going to the main city of novigrad where geralt is UwU)
> 
> What should I do guys? Is it geralt or not? Do you guys want it to be geralt? Let me know I love you guys comments


	7. announcement very important

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> discontuined

its discontinued because i have so much to do and needed a fresh start don't worry this story WILL be back march 20th 2021


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